3 Reasons You Should Be Fighting For Your Marriage
Every relationship has its fair share of ups and downs. However if you are feeling a sense of hopelessness when it comes to your marriage, or long-term relationship, there are certain indicators to look out for to determine if not all is lost. Whether you should be continuing to work on it or whether it really is time to let go and go your separate ways.
Misplacement of Feelings
Whilst feelings of hopelessness and sadness are obviously not a positive sign, they don’t necessarily mean it is the end. When you got married you have positive feelings of hope and an excitement for the future. That has changed, as our emotions do over time. But that then also means that it can change back again. Therefore those feelings of hopelessness that you and your spouse may be experiencing do not need to be seen as such a crippling emotion.
Instead see it as an opportunity to change those feelings and work to get back those emotions of hope and positivity for the future. Our emotions can be hugely determined by our environment, surroundings and lifestyle and it is very easy to blame stress and feelings of hopelessness or unhappiness on our relationships. Therefore it is important to be mindful of where your feelings of hopelessness are coming from to prevent automatically blaming each other for general feelings of unhappiness.
Reaching Out For Help
Reaching out for help, when having marital problems, is a really positive indication that both of you are wanting to work through your problems. Looking into couples therapy or maybe even looking into couple counseling retreats is a really good sign that you are both doing everything in your power to understand the problems that you are experiencing. Looking for professional help will allow you to talk through your problems and issues and will let you both explore each others perspectives. This will be invaluable in allowing you to learn different ways to approach the problems that you are experiencing therefore it is a really positive sign if this is something that you are both committed to and determined to see out.
Trying To Convince Yourself
It is very normal when considering a divorce to begin convincing yourself that you will be happier alone. This is not always the case however and it is a dangerous notion to begin feeling like the ‘grass is greener on the other side’. Of course we are all happier in less stressful, less conflictual situations and relationships, but that does not mean that this current relationship can’t still be pulled back into a calmer and less conflictual state.
When you married you were promising a connection and a commitment to offer to give and receive companionship through life. That is not always easy. When things are bad we put in a lot of work convincing ourselves that we will be best of out of it. However if you take a step back and think about all the things that you will be loosing you may start to see a divorce from a different perspective. So spend some time thinking about whether you are purely trying to convince yourself of what is best in your future or whether you really feel them, deep down and truly believe that it is the end.